Scars

What is a scar? Webster's defines a scar as

1. a mark left (as in the skin) by healing of injured tissue 2. a mark left on a stem or branch by a fallen leaf or harvested fruit 3. a mark or indentation resulting from damaged wear 4. a lasting moral or emotional injury

My definition is that a scar tells a story. I have a scar on my chin from when I was 5 and showing off on my bike and ended up with 18 stitches. A nice scar on my knee from basic training when I didn't quite crawl low enough during my low crawl under a razor wire fence. Far too many surgical scars from where something was wrong and a good Dr. went in to fix it.

So this weekend I was at my friends annual birthday party and a friend of mine, who has a talent for getting ladies to flash him, was up to his old tricks. Anyway we went into the bouncy castle (yup the kind you are thinking of from when you were a kid..what can I say, it's tradition) so anyway, we sit in there having one of those heart to heart chats...ya know those once that only happen every now and then, but when they do it's amazing. Anyway, I had told him that he would never catch me doing that. Not that I was ever brought up like that or anything, but I told him because of my scars I would never do that. I had never told him about what happened but I realized something that night. I am not proud of my body, not proud to show off anything...it has been 11 long years since I have liked anything about my physical self.

Someday...not that brave, or silly....seems simple, yet it's not.

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