Punky Productions is a reality

Well it's hard to believe but I am now holding in my hands the 1st official business cards for Punky Productions. I am so excited to have an outside passion for photography, I actually had someone ask me if they could book me for the first week of Dec. 2008 (um yeah, not quite that busy just yet!!) So, slowly word is spreading that I do this and enjoy it. Hopefully people are happy with the results! In the next few days I will scan in my card to show it off!!!

GOAL!!!

Last night at hockey I scored my first goal, whoohoo!! It was truly an awesome feeling. We still ended up losing the game, but that didn't dampen my spirit. So that is me doing a little bragging!

Also, I will be taking the pictures for the MGHA New Years Eve bash so I am totally stoked about that. It feels good that people ask me to do that,I probably would have taken pictures anyway but its nice to be "official photographer."

I did order business cards the other day, they are pretty sweet! can't wait until they arrive.

Its been a while

This morning I thought rather than do some "house stuff" I would take the time to sit and drink my coffee and write a bit. The last few weeks, well okay last month, has been a blur. From looking at houses, to putting and offer in, then moving all took less than 2 months. Slightly different from my preconceived notions on house buying.

Let's see, last weekend I had my first paid photography gig and my nights lately have been consumed by attempting to learn how to use Photoshop. I am thinking it might be good to take a class at the camera shop on this since I have no flippin clue what I am doing! I am trying to get my business name on the bottom, which I figured out how to do, but it won't save as anything but a Photoshop file..so that is what I need to figure out before the end of the weekend. I need to turn in my pictures next week.

Speaking of business, yesterday I mailed out the tax stuff for a sole-proprietorship which will make tax time much easier for the photography stuff. On Saturday afternoon I will be going downtown to shoot Angela and Ben's engagement photos as well which I am really looking forward to. I owe much of my reason for picking up a camera to her, so thank you Angela!!

I have spent much of the last 2 weeks trying to get myself out of this "funk" that I have fallen into. Truthfully, it all started in anticipation of my parents visit. And with the simple words of a new friend "Sometimes we need to create a family of choice. Jenn, you might need to do that too." Simple, profound, scary.

I am going on Sunday to see the documentary For the bible tells me so. I will be alone most of the weekend so I thought it would be a good time to go.

Right now I am just focusing on surrounding myself with people that love and care about me for who I am. Not letting the little things get to me and always looking on the bright side. 

Something to think about

for the bible tells me so

go see this documentary..open your eyes.

Tired

I have a ton to write, about the weekend visit with my folks and life in general. But I am physically and emotionally drained right now.

The care of a stranger

Yesterday at work one of the girls gave me a People Magizine from Nov.19th that had an article about a christian lady who's daughter committed suicide after struggling with being a lesbian. The mother name is Mary Lou and she origionally told her daughter that although she loved HER she felt being gay was a sin and she could not accept that. Mary Lou has a web site called teach ministries which is a wonderful site for anyone GLBT or their Allies.
So, I sent an email to their web site, asking for some help with my parents since they are also christian and struggling with this for quite a while. I recieved the most wonderful, caring letter back from Mary Lou within the hour! Tears just rolled down my cheeks as I read this at work..for the first time, I felt like someone "just like" my mother was wrapping their arms around me and saying it was okay, that they love me just the way I am.
Go visit them Teach Ministries

Well I have to get some stuff ready for my mom and dad's visit. They will be here in a couple of hours.

Some observations

In the last couple of days we have gotten a few inches of snow. I am not sure what the latest total is but I am assuming around 7-8 inches. Now, a month ago this would not have been much of an issue since my landlord took care of the driveway (and it was kind of short anyway) but now that we own our place guess who is out shoveling?! This weekend I am getting a snow blower but until that time, I must clear out the driveway on my own. I remember years ago when dad would get home from work and go out to do the driveway.. I thought it was so cool. Yeah, not so much. Cold perhaps...freezing at times..but not cool. Last night when I got home from work I shoveled for about and hour and then at 615am I had to start all over again..so here are the things I was thinking of while shoveling:

• it's way to damn early and cold to be out here
• suddenly 500$ seems like a bargain for a snow blower
• wind pants, although keeps the snow off...not so much warm
• now i know why the gloves i found were in the trunk..they suck!
• hat..very important item, must pick one up
• i really don't want to do this again tonight
• did i mention pants...really need to pick up snow pants or something
• remember moon boots? my folks used to EACH have a pair..wonder if those kept you feet warmer
• I think tonight before i start again I will build a fire, love the fireplace!

Now wasn't that fun?! okay time to put away the dishes..i love this life!

Heartbreak

So my parents are coming for a visit in 3 days. As usual right now I am busy trying to choreograph the entire visit, trying to make sure they enjoy their visit, and allowing for time to hang out. This weekend is going to be slightly longer since they are coming on Friday and not leaving until Monday so they can watch the hockey game Sunday night. While they are here we will attend my work holiday function and do some work around the house. Sound pretty simple and nice right? Well that is where the kicker is… since they have STILL not met Loni (after 7 ½ years) they will not be in the same place as her at the same time. This usually causes me the anxiety since I do not want to ask Loni to leave her house and make sure my parents are not uncomfortable.

But, I am at a point that I am not sure what to do. I know my parents are set in their ways and their thinking, which I am not trying to change. But at what point can I say enough is enough!! How long will they continue to sit in their judgment?!
They are predicting another weekend of snow and freezing rain which means Loni will not go up hunting as planned and then I will not be able to have them over to the house because she will be home. I cannot nor will I ask Loni to risk her safety to drive somewhere if the weather is poor just so my parents can see the inside of my new home. For too long I have tried to take the high road, hoping that somehow they will come to understand me, or care about my life and who makes me happy.

I wish I knew someone that could talk to them, help them understand or comes to term with this. A co-worker told me of a story about a young girl that was gay and her mom was a strict christian as well and couldn’t accept her daughter. So the kid committed suicide. Now the mom realizes that wasn’t quite so bad….

I just wish I had an answer or a solution… I just feel sad and upset

Ever Wondered...

Do you remember those books that would allow you to choose your adventure? If you wanted to explore something go to page 4 and if you wanted to do nothing turn to page 6?! Tonight I thought about my life and tried to think of what life would have been like had I made a different choice. What would have happened had I not been adopted into my family? What would it have been like if I had siblings? How would life had changed if I stayed at Ferris that 1 last year? What if I would have remained in Texas? Would things be different if I would have gone to Iraq?

Recently I have felt that I was supposed to be in Madison, at this time, for a reason. I know I have met people here and had experiences that have changed and challenged me. Hopefully, I am a better person for these encounters. Perhaps I have made a difference with my life.